NHL Mega-Mock Draft Reboot - Discussion / Draft Thread – SUPER PEJORATIVE BEDARDED PHASE TWENTY-SIX!

[BernieParent]

Sorry for delay. Had a shitty day that only got worse overnight.

I went over to my brother's house to celebrate my step-mom's birthday and after that was over I rushed home to catch the Rams game. Shortly before kickoff my mom texted us that our aunt had passed away. She has been in hospice for months and fighting numerous cancers for years so we knew it was coming and it's a bit of mercy towards her and my mom who looked after her.

I proceeded to watch the game with hope in my eyes and it admittedly was a very good game just with a bad result for me. The game ended sometime around 11PM and I fell asleep around 11:30.

Fast forward to 1:00AM and I wake up to Thatcher Venmo screaming so I go in his bedroom to find that he's covered in his own vomit. He would go on to throw up several more times over the night but he did it like a champ so i'm very proud of him.

I'm running on empty with all that happening and then something else that i'll get into at some other time on here.

With all of that said, while he is not Thatcher Venmo's favorite player, we're proud to select as our first future head of phase twenty six...

Will Smith (with a caveat that if the courts rule that Jojo could not actually take Bedard we select him instead) History will remember this.

@Striiker have at it. I apologize for the delay.

I'm so sorry to hear, HC. Baby vomit is such a joy to deal with, both with the actual clean-up and figuring out the cause.

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

I loved it. But I'm sure it depends on what fillings they put in it.

It's the Japanese mayo and the cabbage that f***s me.

 

[Strawberry Fields]

Futurehead 1

Zach Benson

@BiggE

 

[ajgoal]

It's the Japanese mayo and the cabbage that f***s me.

I'm Polish, so cabbage is part of my DNA. This and tuna are about the only things I can tolerate mayo on.

 

[Magua]

I don’t want to pull a Rebel, but I’ve picked 17th, 16th, and 11th in every futures draft. I feel like the Flyers. But without the feeling of a job well done.

Futurehead 1

Zach Benson

View attachment 803663

@BiggE

 

[Beef Invictus]

I can't stomach that at all. I had some at a Japanese place in Bangkok - like a legitimate restaurant - and emptied my insides out.

85% of your stories are:

"I ate food and then shat and puked demonically"

 

[Striiker]

85% of your stories are:

"I ate food and then shat and puked demonically"

To be fair, 85% of your stories are:

“I had a kid and she behaves demonically”

 

[BernieParent]

I'm obviously missing 15% of stories around here.

 

[Magua]

To be fair, 85% of your stories are:

“I had a kid and she behaves demonically”

To be fair, 85% of your stories are:

“Nuggies nuggies choccy milk, look at my new FIFA card.”

 

[ajgoal]

To be fair, 85% of your stories are:

“Nuggies nuggies choccy milk, look at my new FIFA card.”

You forgot, "The Fast and Furious series got good once they added Duane."

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

85% of your stories are:

"I ate food and then shat and puked demonically"

I just saw the current version of Young Sheldon and shat and puked demonically.
But it was funny as f*** - he's about 6'2 and 35 years old.

 

[Striiker]

To be fair, 85% of your stories are:

“Nuggies nuggies choccy milk, look at my new FIFA card.”

You don’t need to thank me

 

[Striiker]

You forgot, "The Fast and Furious series got good once they added Duane."

WHAT

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

WHAT

Dwayne is the f***ing worst, man - you should change your mind about your rankings.

 

[BiggE]

Again, really??

Yeah, ok. So the official bar of the Methgators is, well if it was up to me, there was this great little hole in the wall in Bangkok, where me, Tim McCarver and 2 teenage ladyboys were trying to chug shots of vodka while trying to avoid getting a good stiff one right in the

But I digress. The official hangout bar of the Jacksonville Methgators is Rick’s from Casablanca!

Oh, and @pit , of all the gin joints in all the world, this is the one you need to make a pick and get blackout drunk in

 

[pit]

Thought I had a shot at Benson at this draft slot. Boo.

Rather than check and see how they have developed in the past six months since I am lazy, I will go with my next pick after Benson and select Oliver Moore.

@Magua , it is your turn to pick.

 

[Magua]

After my top 6 guys in the class -- all taken -- I could go in many directions. Can I trade down? No? Okay, then I'm feeling this one.

The Honolulu Ghibli select as our Futurehead......Gabe Perreault



The leading point getter at Boston College and non-stat padding medal round hero at the WJC. What a guy. Just not good enough for 22nd overall on Earth Prime.

****

@DancingPanther -- fetch the warmest of linens and make the bestest of picks, my bröther!

 

[DancingPanther]

I cannot begin to describe how much I don't care about sports fandom right now, so I'm saving this stupid hockey shit for last. I couldn't name more than 5 players in this draft. Hockey is stupid, sports are stupid, the world is stupid, work is stupid. You people rule, and so do my dogs. I'd like to thank Girl for again helping me with category selections.

I will start off with the obvious. Somehow, a few weeks ago when the free DLC came out, I realized I have not laid claim to what I believe now is the deepest character in video game history.

The Plats are tremendously proud to select a wise, loyal, loving, father and friend as our team commando. Introducing Greek God of War and Norse God of Hope: Kratos



@Chuck Downie

 

[Captain Dave Poulin]

This NFL season proved once again that the offseason is more interesting than the disgusting shit that happens in the games.

We start the day with @Chuck Downie on the clock, @mja on deck, @GKJ on the lido deck, and BigToe on the lido afterdeck.

Meh, I don't know. Sports are f***ing stupid. You know they are stupid when yours truly doesn't even notice when his "favorite" team beats the f***ing Blues. The genie is out of the bottle, and the genie is caked in shit.

 

[Chuck Downie]

Les Comiques first pick in Phase 26 will be:

Team Commercial

Knorr frozen entrees



@mja

 

[mja]

Team Futurehead #1

All the guys I know anything about are already off the board, so the NJFZ are going to fall back on the tried and true strategy of taking a Finn in recognition of Team Owner Sami Kapanen's heritage. Well, this guy is only half-Finn, and he was born, raised, plays in and plays for Sweden, but still!

Axel Sandin Pellikka

@GKJ

 

[GKJ]

I’ll take our flyer flower child defenseman, Oliver Bonk


@BigToe

 

[BigToe]

mja sniped me. That’s not nice.

Team Scientist - Isaac Newton

IsaacNewtongif.gif

@Beef Invictus help me beat mja up

 

[Young Sandwich]

mja sniped me. That’s not nice.

Team Scientist - Albert Einstein

FunnyEinsteingif.gif

@Beef Invictus help me beat mja up

Sorry to shit on your parade Toe, but I believe Einstein was taken already for something else.

 

[mja]

mja sniped me. That’s not nice.

Team Scientist - Albert Einstein

FunnyEinsteingif.gif

@Beef Invictus help me beat mja up

Please. Beef has his hands full at home and I'm not scared of you, you're just a toe. Now settle down or else I'll be forced to stub you.