Scott Stevens

Scott Stevens once sneezed...it was confused with a gale force wind.

Scott Stevens found Osama bin Laden...and chained him to the floor in his basement.

Hiroshima was not actually destroyed by an A-bomb...Scott Stevens just checked someone 5 miles away and the shockwaves did the damage.

Scott Stevens is the second coming of Christ.

Scott Stevens' check was almost ruled a war crime, but world leaders are too afraid of his wrath.

Stevens in German means "flyers cryptinite"

Stevens in German means "flyers cryptinite"In Italian it means "eruption on a Flyer with his head down."

Stevens has one weakness....

he actually played with the capitals..

Everytime you masturbate, Scott Stevens checks something. Not because you masturbated, but because that is how often he delivers a crushing hit.

I bet some opposing players will be at the celebration tonight. Not because they came special for it, but because they are still lying on the ice where Scottie left them!!!! :biglaugh:

All your open ice hits are belong to Stevens?

For Scott Stevens tonight, instead of a ceremonial dropping of the first puck at center ice, they had a ceremonial dropping of the first opponent at center ice.

For Scott Stevens tonight, instead of a ceremonial dropping of the first puck at center ice, they had a ceremonial dropping of the first opponent at center ice.

rofl thats pretty good.


Scott Stevens once played a hockey game against the Devil and won a solid gold hockey stick.

Stevens hit Lindros so hard that he was a Flyer when he got hit and a Ranger when he woke up. :clap: